Purpose and Meaning: Making Sense of Midlife

What if midlife was a can-full of candy and worms and all crap, would we still find meaning in it?

The Midlife Crisis

Midlife, for some, feels a lot like teetering on the edge of a cliff, staring down at all that's passed by, looking out with an uncertain gaze toward what's ahead. 

The energy of youth is waning, and the quest for purpose grows louder and more insistent. Quite possibly, you will catch yourself wondering, "What am I really here for?"

The Midlife Drift

Imagine you are driving down the road, windows down, music on high. It feels great, enjoying all the things you're seeing, hearing, doing—all very new at every turn. 

But after each mile, the feeling of excitement starts to fade away, and one becomes a bit lost. That thrill starts to fade, and one is hit with the realization that maybe they are no longer headed in the right direction. 

That's what midlife can feel like. Where did those goals—set up in your 20s and 30s—get you? The kids grow up, careers level out, and life's daily grind becomes more and more visible.

An Unexpected Wake-Up Call

I recall a friend, whom we'll call only by her first name, Sue. Shortly after her 45th birthday, all was well: she was successful in her career, had her loving family, and a beautiful home, yet something was missing. 

She was just feeling an emptiness inside like her life was half there and not very fulfilling. She looked at a pile of old photo albums one day and reminisced. 

The good times seemed richer and full of texture then; she knew that she'd been busy ticking the boxes life threw her way, but inwardly, she hadn't really stopped to think: "What does it all mean?

The story of Sue is not unique. In fact, it's a chapter in many of our lives. General feeling of drift, which provides the sense of disorientation and, "We don't know what we're doing here and we don't know where to go from here." 

But this can be the beginning of something so powerful it can be unimaginable—purpose.

Meaning-making in the midst of midlife usually happens when one must stop, look back, and recollect how much life really matters and redefine his or her life. 

Scary? 

Definitely. 

Yet at this midlife mark, there is a chance to create a new definition of what life can really mean, to reframe it. As written 

Ecclesiastes 3:1, New Living Translation (NLT),

 "For everything, there is a season, a time for every activity under heaven." 

Literally, midlife is a season—a time not for the end of the road but for steering into what will bring sweet joy and satisfaction.

A Whole New Perspective

Imagine that midlife is like turning to the second chapter in this book called life. You were learning things about yourself and the world in those first chapters, and now is the time to really apply the knowledge. 

The best time to recalibrate your values and align actions in the pursuit of those values is at this moment. What stirs your passion? What will be your legacy? Those can be really big questions, but at the essence, it is what fulfills purpose.

Well, for Sue, she chose to lighten her professional load and become a volunteer at a shelter. It wasn't glamorous, but it brought her deep fulfillment. 

Her evenings, once filled with endless work emails, were now spent mentoring young women who were facing some of the same hurdles she overcame.

The Power of Faith

Another friend, Mike, got mugged by a situation much like mine. He had spent decades climbing the greasy pole, reached the top, looked around, and—so to speak—wondered, "Is this it?" 

Aching to fix the hollowness in his soul, he began to find solace in his spirituality. He seized Psalm 138:8: "The Lord will work out his plans for my life— for your faithful love, O Lord, endures forever."

It was then that Mike started to realize that his purpose was not all about success in a career. He focused on lighting his community and, in return, started a small group at his church for others to find their way toward living a life of purpose. 

Right away, it changed him and those around him.

Embrace the Journey

But finding meaning from midlife is not something that really involves a great revelation, a 180-degree turn, or doing something suddenly and really different. 

It's just about those changes that can really come in small but very deliberate steps as you move forward to live a life that you believe in, one that really expresses your deeply cherished principles. 

Embrace this season as a journey, and not the destination. Remember, you are not out in this thing alone; plenty have walked this path and gained a more fundamental, insightful sense of purpose amidst the voyage.

Ponder about it, from where you have come and where you think you are going: 

"For I know the plans I have for you," says the Lord. "They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope." —Jeremiah 29:11 (NLT)

Midlife can be the most meaningful time of your life so far—a time to refocus, find new meaning in things you love to do, and re-envision what's possible in the second half of life.

Scripture References:

Ecclesiastes3:1 LEB

Psalms 138:8 LEB

Jeremiah 29:11 LEB

Forgiveness and Reconciliation: Reconciling with the Past

You will learn to live a happier life if you learn to forgive and forget

Forgiveness

This is the source of very deep actions of forgiveness and reconciliation; they heal our souls and repair the fragmented relationships that have been disintegrated. These processes are not easy, which requires a high degree of courage and humility. In solving these ruptured relationships, the path requires that we understand true forgiveness and right the wrongs committed. The process is difficult, but at the same time, it is worthy in experiencing inner peace and spiritual growth.

Our Power to Forgive

Forgiveness is an action of power—freeing us from being enslaved by our own bitterness and resentment. Not necessarily forgetting the wrongs done to us, but choosing to let go of their claim on our hearts—in an act of the will.

Consider a lady called Sarah, who draped the albatross of her bitterness against her father for many years. He had left the family when she was but a small girl, leaving her feeling abandoned and all alone. That abandonment hurt had trailed her into adulthood, poisoning her relationships and robbing her of joy. Every time she would try to get on with her life, the bitterness pulled her back again, shining the spotlight on those ugly deep scars from her childhood.

One day, Sarah attended a church service where the preacher was talking about the power of forgiveness. 

His message pierced her heart and she suddenly realized that her angry feelings did not hurt her father at all; it only killed her inside. 

Sarah prayed that she receives the grace to forgive, not her father for his wrongful deeds towards her, but to free herself from the bitterness that had taken control of her. 

As she whispered some prayer of forgiveness, a weight lifted from her shoulders, and for the first time in years, she found true peace.

The Bible underlines that liberating power of forgiveness in

 Ephesians 4:31-32 (NLT)

Get rid of all bitterness, rage, anger, harsh words, and slander, as well as all types of evil behavior. Instead, be kind to each other, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God through Christ has forgiven you."* The journey of forgiveness for Sarah had enabled her to move on, no longer held hostage by the pain in her past.

The Road to Reconciliation

While forgiveness is a personal act, reconciliation is a joint effort. It involves the rebuilding of trust and restoration of relationships gone bad. 

Reconciliation is a process that calls for humility and patience and often the will to confront unpleasant truths.

Consider the example from the Bible of Joseph. While his brothers sold him off into slavery, he spent years being away from home, undergoing so much hardship, and led a completely different life. 

Even when his brothers wrongly sold him into slavery, Joseph did not take revenge on them when he finally rose to a position of power within the government of Egypt. 

He tested the hearts of the brothers, to see whether they had changed or not, and after he was convinced that they were truly repentant, Joseph revealed himself to them, embraced them, and gave them his forgiveness.

In Genesis 50:20-21 (NLT), Joseph tells his brothers', "You intended to harm me, but God intended it all for good. He brought me to this position so I could save the lives of many people.  21  No, don't be afraid. I will continue to take care of you and your children." So he reassured them by speaking kindly to them.

Joseph did not immediately set on a reconciliatory journey. It took him some internalization that probably God would heal the wounds of the past. 

Joseph, for giving his brothers and reconciling with them, did not just restore his family; he eventually saved them from the famine.

 Reconciling With the Past

Reconciling with the past is an important step that has to be made on the journey to forgiveness and reconciliation—to acknowledge the pain, seek healing, and decide to walk on with love and grace. 

It does not mean that the past has been erased or that the wrongs, by some magical process, are now right, but it does mean that now no longer has the past power over our present and future.

When we reflect on the stories of Sarah and Joseph, we realize that forgiveness and reconciliation are very important to our relationship with God. 

They are the most faithful of acts: the incidents that challenge us and call us to embrace God's plan and transforming power, that even in the agony of it all, it could result in healing and growth.

In 2 Corinthians 5:18 (NLT), Paul reminds us, "And all of this is a gift from God, who brought us back to himself through Christ. And God has given us this task of reconciling people to him."

 Just as God has reconciled us to Himself through Christ, we are called to pursue reconciliation in our relationships.

Conclusion

Forgiveness and reconciliation are not easy, yet they are part and parcel of our well-being and spiritual growth. In the act of forgiving and striving for reconciliation with others, the deepest healing and peace will come. 

It is painful, but what freedom of the past and the future that you gain with every step is so much a benefit.

As you consider your personal history, think about areas where you might need to forgive or be reconciled. Pray for empowerment to make the necessary steps, believing that God will guide your process. 

Remember, although the past shapes us, it does not define us. Forgiveness and reconciliation can bring freedom that will enable us to move on—to live in the fullness of God's grace.

Ministry of the Holy Spirit: 1; The Indwelling Spirit

 

Ministry of the Holy Ghost

The Holy Spirit Descended on them like flames of fire

Let's start this discussion with Genesis 1:2

² Now the earth was formless and empty, darkness was over the surface of the deep, and the Spirit of God was hovering over the waters.

Genesis 1:2

I this verse we see that the earth was in chaos. Wherever there is chaos the Holy spirit is there to bring sanity and order. We also find that God the father, son and Holy Spirit are acting in unison

• Father is the author of salvation or creation
• son executes the plan of the father
• Spirit reveals the plan of God
• 

From this elaborate work of creation man has continued to pass on the seed of sin that can only be paid with death but the holy spirit Gives life.

And I will ask the Father, and he will give you another advocate to help you and be with you forever— ¹⁷ the Spirit of truth. The world cannot accept him, because it neither sees him nor knows him. But you know him, for he lives with you and will be in you. ¹⁸ I will not leave you as orphans; I will come to you

This is a verse from John 14:16-18 where the Holy spirit is promised as a helper, one that will be with you always. It's quite encouraging as a believer to know you have this power from God Himself, in fact God Himself always with you.

in John 18:17 we see Peter reacting outside of the Holy spirit, in fear, since the Holy spirit had not yet been given to the disciples. when the Holy spirit is at work the fear is no more. We can bear witness to that when the same peter testifies openly and boldly about Jesus on the day of Pentecost when the Holy Spirit descended upon him and the others.

The world can't see or know the Holy Spirit

1 Corinthians 12:12 We are baptized into one body though having different gifting and the Holy Spirit manifesting in us in different ways.

The moment you believe in Jesus, the following happens

• the Holy Spirit imparts in you an eternal and inseparable union with Jesus. He baptizes you in the spirit of Jesus
• You start receiving the riches of God's grace, one of them being imputed with righteousness.
• Imparts in you the gift of love and the ability to defeat temptation.

Though Adam was morally upright, he lacked the Holy Spirit so he fell when he was tempted by the devil. This is one of the key works of the Holy spirit in a believer in that He strengthens him to resist temptation.

He is also a guarantee that you'll meet God in heaven.

In the old testament the Holy Spirit would on come UPON men but not live In them. We have a classical example of Saul, who would consult from the prophets, get insights to rule over his kingdom and when the Holy Spirit was on him he would do exploits. But when the Holy spirit left him, Saul would become mad, necessitating the services of David, the guitarist.

And here comes the Pentecost

Pentecost comes from a Hebrew word that translates to the 50th day. God chose that day for the Holy Spirit to come and take over from Jesus, to permanently live in us and never go back.

In the old testament the presence of the Holy Spirit was represented by the Ark of Covenant. You needed to be in a certain place, with a particular person as your representative because the box was only meant to interact with a chosen few, the priests. but when the curtain to the holy of holies (where the ark of covenant was kept) tore in the middle, everyone was given free access to Him. He now lives IN US. In fact the Bible states clearly in Acts 7:48 that The Most High can't live in houses made by human hands

 ⁶ But Christ is faithful as the Son over God’s house. And we are his house, if indeed we hold firmly to our confidence and the hope in which we glory.

Hebrews3:6

¹⁹ Do you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; ²⁰ you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your bodies.

1 Corinthians 6:19-20

In the old testament there was a temple, set apart for God, where there was an Ark of Covenant in the Holy of Holies. this is where the Shakaina glory lived. Today if you believe that Christ was raised from the dead and confess His lordship, you become His dwelling place through the Holy Spirit and you have the Shakaina Glory of God.

²⁰ Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us,

Ephesians 3:20

The power of the Holy Spirit is resident and at work in us who believe.

⁴ You, dear children, are from God and have overcome them, because the one who is in you is greater than the one who is in the world.

1 John 4:4

This scripture tells me that the Spirit of God is in me and is greater than the one who is outside. Now that God can't share the same place with the devil, that means that the devil can't dare get inside me. the only thing that the devil can do is play tricks on you until you mess up and deceive you how God is angry with you.

Romans 8:8-10 confirms that that the Holy Spirit lives in us . the beauty of it is that by being the Holy Spirit's palace, the angels guard it all the time whether you pray about it or not coz the power of Heaven lives in you.

How to Create a Deeper Relationship with God

 

Grow in Faith

Becoming more intimate with God is not just an experience. It's an ongoing process that calls for dedication, reflection and a teachable spirit. There are so many who want to be closer to God, but only want to do it by their own efforts, and by their own standards.

On the contrary, God wants to bring you closer to Himself by his own hand, and on His own terms. After all Christ is not the bride: you are. Now tell me; between the bride and the groom, who entreats the other to themselves? The groom, right? Then why do you want things to be different with God?

Spiritual Growth... or is it growth in Faith?

When people talk of growing spiritually, they are referring to being conformed to the image of christ. It's a process that starts from the time you believe in the gospel of Christ, and continues.....

2 Corinthians 3:18

New International Version

18 And we all, who with unveiled faces contemplate[a] the Lord’s glory, are being transformed into his image with ever-increasing glory, which comes from the Lord, who is the Spirit.

Sanctification, as it's referred, is a process grounded on the working of the Holy Spirit. All you need to do is to yield yourself up to his leading, and he will gradually transform you from inside out. In Galatians 5:22-23, Paul lists the fruits that will be apparent in you when you subject to the leadership of the Holy Spirit.

However, you would do better than to try to force them out of yourself without Him having born them inside you. You will burn out sooner or later. If you are guava inside, don't struggle to bear mangoes. Wait till the Holy Spirit bears them through you in increasing measure.

Prayer and Meditation

Prayer is not just another ritual or even a religious activity. It is communion with God. In prayer we thank God for all He has done, which can see or are yet to see, we interact with Him through the connection of His Spirit, and cast our care unto him.

It is for this reason that we are reminded to pray without ceasing. (1 Thessalonians 5:16). Like your most cherished lover, God wants to be in communion with you. You don't have to ask, ask, ask, ask. You can marvel at the divine attributes of God.

Pray for others, pray for the nation...by all means pray. Instead of sulking you can take those worries to God This is what He is telling us:

Philipians 4:6-7

But before you can pray effectively, you need to know what the word of God says. This is because an effective prayer is based on God's will, which you can only know through His word.

That is exactly what is contained in the Bible. God's word is His power... unto salvation. It has all the things you require to live an abundant life. If you meditate on the word of God daily(Psalms 1:2-3), then you will have led a beautiful life. You will know God all the more, and will be drawn to him all the more, and His power will be more apparent in your life.

The Role of the Holy Spirit

As said earlier, it is the work of th eHoly Spirit to build a more intimate bond between you and God, and yours is to subject yourself to him. His indwelling guidance will help you live a life that honors God. 

The Indwelling Spirit

Upon believing and being born again, the believer is indwelt by the Holy Spirit. He is not just a sign of salvation and a mark that we belong to God, he is also the springboard for sanctification and the driving force too. In 1 Corinthians 6:19, Paul speaks of our bodies as the temples of the Holy Spirit.

Well he is not talking of the temple like the church where we go to every sunday and go about our businesses out of church the whole week: He is talking from the priest's point of view, because th epriest lived in the temple. Now the Holy Spirit has made our bodies his dwelling place. He's not moving out any time soon or later.

He signifies that we are set aside for God's purposes, and continues to make small changes within us to conform us to our new identity.

While inside us, the Spirit testifies with out souls that we are children of God(Romans 8:16-20). As God's children, he nourishes us with what we need for growth in faith and in knowledge of the truth. He convicts the world of its sin through us and demonstrates our righteousness in God(John 16:8) He is the only one we need in us to live a life concurrent with our new nature in Christ.

The Holy Spirit as a Guide

In John 16:13, Christ promised the Helper who would lead us into all truth. He has now come, lives in us and leads us into the word of truth. His guidance is more than that of a father to a son; he searches the innermost secrets of God and helps us align with the thoughts of God.

This is more than a mere discernment of right and wrong. In fact, no one has ever been made right with God by doing what is right and shunning the wrong. The Holy Spirit makes us understand th escriptures in depth, allowing us to know what exactly God is saying and meaning and thus cementing our faith in Him.

Needless to say, the Bible is God's blueprint, and to understand it is to get into his thoughts. Furthermore, it is the primary tool for sanctification, as it bares the character of God to us and tells us, " this is what you have become.(2 Timothy 3:16-17)

This brings to mind the story of a vulture that was captured as a small chick, and brought up among chickens. As the small chicks quaked and scratched, the small vulture, we shall call her Hellen, having no other role model, believed she was one of them and scratched and tried to quack like them. 

In her adolescence Hellen was behaving exactly like the other adolescent chicks, but wished she could fly every time an eagle passed by. But one day a vulture perched herself in a nearby tre and said in vulture language, " you are one of us, look at me and compare with yourself!" Hellen looked at her reflection in a water tray and realized she was more of a vulture than a hen

When the vulture in the tree flew away, Hellen followed suit, flapped her wings and glided in flight. That's what the Spirit does to us. When we read what humans can't do, He tells us, " you are gods"(Psalms 82:6). When the world is cracking under the weight of sin he announces to us that we can not sin(1 John 3:9). When others are struggling to grasp the truth, the Spirit has revealed all things to us(1 John 2:20). I have covered more in depth on the role of the Holy Spirit in my book. Grab a copy and read more.

If you give yourself wholly to the Holy Spirit, are intentional on getting deeper into a relationship with God, and are committed to the journey, you hav eno cause for worry. Many have been here and succeeded. In fact, there is nothing to succeed in. It is God drawing you near to Himself. Yours is to comply. To believe him when he says you are what His word says you are.

 As we commit to prayer, meditation on Scripture, fellowship with other believers, and reliance on the Holy Spirit, we will find ourselves growing in faith, love, and holiness. As I have said earlier in this blog, growing in faith and getting deeper is not a destination but a journey. With the help of the Holy Spirit, you have already been brought close to God. In fact, You are in God.

3 Steps to Forgiveness and Reconciliation

 

Of the deadliest poisons, one is bitterness, because it eats away at the heart leaving in its wake broken relationships, pain and spiritual decay. But you must be asking yourself, "can I really unshackle myself from the bondage of acrimony?

You are not alone( not good news though). there are so many others just like you,strugglung with anger, unresolved issues, and deep-seated hurt that create a barricade of resentment, which separates you from others and even from experiencing the very essence of God.

Good news: there is a cure, which you have been avoiding. like the sour-tasting pills that make you puke but ultimately ease your pain, you will only find healing within forgiveness and reconciliation.

The Burden of Bitterness

Holding on to grudges is like carrying a heavy load that only gets heavier with time. The more you harbor piqueness in your heart, the more you feel the need to revenge. The truth is, bitterness is not just an emotional burden: it seeps into every aspect of your life, affecting your relationships, physical and mental health, and spiritual well-being.

In Hebrews 12:15, the Bible warns:

Hebrews 12:15

The Voice

15 Watch carefully that no one falls short of God’s favor, that no well of bitterness springs up to trouble you and throw many others off the path.

Bitterness defiles both the wronged person and also those around them. It's like a fart, that makes the air foul for those in the vicinity though it only came from one person. But this one does not lead to a mere twitching of the nose: it leads to anger, malice revenge, and separates us from those we care about.

Forgiveness

Forgiveness is not about justifying wrongs done to us or even forgetting the pain. There is another word for that. Instead, it's about releasing yourself from the grip of anger and resentment. 

You don't have to be a prisoner of your own feelings all your life. You don't have to carry someone in your heart for decades. You don't have to keep poisoning yourself till thy kingdom come.

Forgiveness is an act of grace, a decision to let go of the need for revenge, and entrust justice to God. Imagine one day without that lump in your throat when you think of a certain person, won't it be great? This life is too short to allow yourself to languish in enmity.

Let God do the heavy-lifting while you enjoy life to the fullest. If you ever feel like you have been subjugated, justice belongs to God. Instead of planning how to get at the other person, plan on a night out with friends. You can even invite the one who wronged you and start working things out.

This is what Christ Jesus taught:

Matthew 6:14-15

The Voice

Jesus says to declare forgiveness of those who have wronged us. This is because forgiveness of other people emulates God’s forgiveness of us.

14 If you forgive people when they sin against you, then your Father will forgive you when you sin against Him and when you sin against your neighbor. 15 But if you do not forgive your neighbors’ sins, your Father will not forgive your sins.

Forgiveness starts with a conscious decision. A decision to let go of hard feelings and to embrace the brighter side of life. The results may not happen overnight. The pain may linger, but each step brings toward healing.

Don't hesitate to take that step toward a better you. Don't stop at what someone did to you. Don't be halted by your feelings, which may try to steer you in another direction. 

Forgiveness unchains you from bitterness and opens the door to reconciliation.

Reconciliation

Forgiveness is individual, but reconciliation is mutual. It requires the input of both parties. One party extends grace and the other receives. Sometimes it's not about who did wrong, or who failed, it's about forging a new path and putting the past behind you.

Restoring broken relationships is not a walk in the park though: it requires courage, humility, repentance and willingness to walk together. This is not subjective to which party, the aggrieved or otherwise, but a mutual need. All parties need these qualities in equal proportion for reconciliation to surfice.

However this doesn't mean that broken relationships will be reinstated to their previous position. It is normal for people to act suspicious of each other after coming back together, or to harbor some sort of reservations. But at least by making an effort towards reconciling, peace and understanding can be achieved.

Matthew 5:23-24

The Voice

23 Therefore, if you are bringing an offering to God and you remember that your brother is angry at you or holds a grudge against you, 24 then leave your gift before the altar, go to your brother, repent and forgive one another, be reconciled, and then return to the altar to offer your gift to God.

Reconciliation is an act of obedience to God, reflecting his desire for us to live in peace and harmony, unity and love. It's not a requirement of some basic law we must fulfil, but the very essence of the image of God.

Don't be afraid, even the most fractured relationships can be healed. You just need to be willing to work together to glue the pieces together. 

Path to Renewal

the path towards reconciliation through forgiveness meanders through thickets, rocks and swamps. It's Not easy, but it's vital.

It's a journey that requires humility, courage, faith... but the rewards are immeasurable. I once asked a lady if she was so furious with me as to put a bullet through my head, and it prompted a huge debate that eventually led to "peace talks". Am not proud of the approach I took then, but at least it ignited something that shed light on our predicament.

Instead of pointing her resentment at me like a loaded gun, she put the safety catch back on and downed her arms so we could talk things over. That's the spirit of forgiveness and reconciliation.

By choosing reconciliation, you break free from bondage to bitterness and open your heart to healing, restoration of relationship and to peace.

Ephesians 4:32

New International Version

32 Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.

Christ Jesus is the epitome of forgiveness and reconciliation. He bore our sins, forgave us and reconciled us to God. Imagine if God still held a grudge against you; how long would you live? But he didn't wait for you to say how sorry you were. Instead He packaged Himself in a body like yours, to be able to feel like you, and bore the punishment due to you.

I know you can't possibly die for your most treasured mate, let alone your enemy. but you can definitely try to bring them closer. Remember, the burden of hurt lies heavily on you, not the other person who wronged you. It's you who is wounded, not them.

It's you who is imprisoned by your own negative feelings. Follow Christ's example and break free. Don't be held back anymore by negativity. Don't suffer while others are enjoying this precious life. Let go of spite and embrace love. 

Remember: there is renewal in forgiveness and reconciliation.