Worship is More than Just a Song

Are You Limiting Worship to Just Music? Here’s What You’re Missing

For years, I thought worship was about the music. The melodies, the harmonies, the words that stirred emotions. And yes, music is a beautiful expression of worship—but if that’s all we think it is, we’re missing something deeper.

Worship is more than what happens on a stage or in a church service. It’s not limited to the songs we sing or the instruments we play. Worship is a way of life, a posture of the heart, and a response to who God is. It is how we live every moment in surrender to Him.

Worship Is About Surrender

The heart of worship is not in performance but in surrender. It’s about coming before God with open hands and an open heart, acknowledging that He is worthy of everything we are. Worship happens when we lay down our own desires and say, “Lord, have Your way in me.”

Romans 12:1 (GW) says: “So, brothers and sisters, because of God’s mercies, I encourage you to offer your bodies as living sacrifices, dedicated to God and pleasing to him. This kind of worship is appropriate for you.”

A living sacrifice. That’s not just about music—it’s about daily choices. It’s about how we treat people, how we handle our work, how we respond in difficult moments. Worship is not just what we say—it’s how we live.

Worship in the Ordinary

One of the biggest shifts in my understanding of worship came when I realized it wasn’t confined to church. Worship is just as real when you’re washing dishes, driving to work, or sitting in silence before God. It’s in how you serve your family, how you handle your business, and how you walk in obedience.

Colossians 3:17 (GW) says: “Whatever you do, whether you talk or act, do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him.”

That means your work can be worship. Your kindness to a stranger can be worship. Your patience in trials can be worship. Every part of your life, when done in love and obedience to God, becomes an offering of praise.

Worship in the Waiting

There have been moments in my life when I felt stuck—when prayers seemed unanswered and doors stayed shut. In those moments, I learned that worship is not just about thanking God when things go well. It’s about trusting Him in the waiting.

Paul and Silas understood this. When they were thrown into prison, they didn’t wait for freedom before worshipping. Acts 16:25 (GW) says: “Around midnight Paul and Silas were praying and singing hymns of praise to God. The other prisoners were listening to them.”

They worshipped while they were still in chains. And that’s the challenge for us—to worship not because of our circumstances, but in spite of them.

Worship as a Lifestyle

When we understand that worship is more than a song, everything changes. We begin to see every moment as an opportunity to glorify God. Worship isn’t just what we do—it’s who we are.

So, what does worship look like in your life? Is it in the way you serve? The way you love? The way you trust?

Let’s choose to live lives of worship—not just on Sundays, not just in music, but in every moment. Because true worship isn’t about a song—it’s about a surrendered heart.

What does worship mean to you? Drop a comment below—I’d love to hear your thoughts!

Why Performance Based Faith is Draining and How to get Rid of it

 

Why Performance-Based Faith Can Be So Draining (And How to Relinquish It)

My dear friends, imagine for a moment that you are on the treadmill of existence, with every step taken merely to demonstrate your adequacy. This quest for acceptance is akin to reaching for a mirage of grace, always just beyond your grasp.

Consider the lyrics of my song:

I was running on the treadmill of life,

Every step just proving I’m not enough.

Reaching for grace like it’s out of my hands,

Trying to earn what was never mine to grasp.

Does this resonate with your experience? The relentless pursuit of feeling worthy, of feeling sufficient in God's eyes? But let us not forget the sweet promise of Jesus:

"Come to me, all of you who are overburdened and overwhelmed, and I will give you rest." - Matthew 11:28 (GW)

This respite is not discovered in our own exertions, but rather in yielding to Him.

The Whirlwind of Self-Reliance

In the tempest of guilt and fear, we flounder,

Our self-reliance like a ship in a stormy sea that falters.

Perhaps you have felt the crushing weight of guilt, the relentless gale of self-condemnation. You endeavor to be good enough, yet every failure seems to pull you further under. This cycle of effort and defeat is as ancient as the dawn of time.

But be of good cheer! For Jesus strides upon the very waves that threaten to engulf us. When Peter took his eyes off the Savior and onto his own capabilities, he began to sink. Yet, when he called out, "Lord, rescue me!" Jesus did so without delay (Matthew 14:30-31).

Such is grace. It is not a trophy for the most diligent, but a lifeline thrown to those who are lost at sea.

Releasing the Grip of Performance-Based Belief

The truth we must embrace is that grace is not something to be merited. It is not the result of our laborious striving. It is a gift, bestowed upon us freely.

"It is by grace that you are saved, through faith, and not by your own efforts. It is God’s gift, not a reward for your good deeds." - Ephesians 2:8 (GW)

Now, how do we disembark from this endless treadmill? How do we release the burden of performance-based faith?

Recognize your acceptance in Christ -

 Understand that in Him, you are already cherished, pardoned, and selected (Ephesians 1:4-5).

Cease your striving and begin to abide - Instead of toiling to deserve grace, find solace in what Jesus has completed (John 15:4-5).

Exchange guilt for faith - 

When guilt whispers of inadequacy, remember Jesus' all-encompassing sacrifice (Romans 8:1).

Allow grace to reshape you -

 True transformation arises not from the dread of disappointing God but from resting in his love and allowing his spirit to mold you (Philippians 2:13).

Grace: A Lifeline, Not a Reward

The more I exerted, the more I was found wanting,

Sinking like a vessel worn and frail in the deep waters of doubt and fear.

If the weight of performance-based faith has been your burden, it is time to set it down. Step off the treadmill, my friend. Halt the futile effort to earn what has already been given without charge. Instead, dive into the welcoming embrace of grace.

Jesus did not summon us to perform. He summoned us to find refuge in his love.

You need not prove your worthiness. In Christ, it is already established.

I encourage you, if you have grappled with the exhaustion of performance-based faith, to share your reflections in the comments below. Moreover, I invite you to listen to my recent composition, which delves deeper into this transformative journey of releasing our grip on striving and welcoming grace.

Unburdened: Living in the Freedom of Grace

 Where Grace is the Boss

Living in the freedom of grace is not a far-fetched idea. It's what we are called into. But, is that what we are doing on a day to day basis? Read on to find out if you have been living in liberty, or as a slave.

Understand Grace

Hey, so we've all heard that we're saved by grace, right? It's like the coolest thing ever, but sometimes it feels like we're just nodding along at Sunday school instead of actually living it. We roll up to Jesus tired out and lugging all our junk, and He's like, "Come on, let me take that load off," and gives us this sweet gift of rest. But then we're out here trying to pay Him back with gold stars for every good deed. But all those points are total rubbish to him. He doesn't care if we are going out of our way to "please" him or not, he only cares for the work He did for us! It's like we're back in kindergarten or something.

Grace isn't just the VIP pass to get into heaven—it's supposed to be the whole party vibe of our lives. It doesn't stop at salvation and leave us stranded. It is the very bread and butter of our lives, we embrace it and live victoriously. But what happens? We get all serious again and start slapping ourselves with rules that aren't even in the playbook Jesus gave us. We're talking about stuff we think we gotta do to keep God happy, like praying with the right words, serving in the exact right ways, and being all holy on the outside. It's like we're trying to win a prize that's already ours.

Absurd!

Now, let's not forget that pitfall of thinking we gotta keep our salvation on a tight leash with all our hard work. We start acting like we're in some kind of divine competition, making up rules that aren't even in the Bible, but we treat them like they're God's own to-do list for us. Maybe, we are so used to abiding by rules that we can't live without them. It's like we're trying to be superheroes when really, Jesus already played that part.

Let's take a page from Paul's book in Galatians:

"Are you really that clueless? After starting with God's Spirit, are you now ending with your own human effort?" (Galatians 3:3, GW)

Our human efforts don't play any part in making God more into us. Isaiah intimated that ALL our righteousness(they are many) are like used sanitary towels. they are good for nothing, except to be thrown into the pit. The only thing that does it is the free gift of righteousness, which is received by grace.

Grace is like the ultimate wingman—

it doesn't just get us in the door, it keeps us grooving on the dance floor without falling over. In fact, grace pulls all the stops and moves, while we enjoy the show. If God ever wanted to be impressed, He already impressed Himself when He gave up His only son to be killed on a wooden cross. That was His greatest show of love. there's nothing we can do to outbid that act. So let's drop the act and stop trying to impress God. He loves us already.

Now, some of this heavy stuff we're carrying around is like hand-me-downs from the religious thrift store. We get told that we still gotta play by Moses' rulebook, with all those old laws about what we can and can't do. But Jesus was like, "Nah, I got a better deal for you. Believe that I exchanged all your sins; past, present and future, and gave you my own right standing with God. 

I played by Moses' rules to the letter, but I still received punishment for those rules you couldn't play by yesteryear, today, and forever. After doing that, I pinned those rules and their legal demands on the cross with my own stamp that said, "Paid in full". Now you don't have to keep on trying to re-invent the wheel, by following them. By me they became obsolete. outdated."

So why are we still lugging around those ancient chains?

But how do we actually live like we're free and loving this grace thing?

Chill with Jesus' Finished Stuff – We don't have to run the extra mile here. What He did on the cross is more than enough for us to be in with God. We're not on a never-ending tryout for His love. You're not inn some kind of probation, if not, recruitment for heaven. In fact, Christ has already made us sit in the heavenly places with him. you may not see it with your naked eyes, but that's where God already sees us.

Say No to Legalism 

– If something makes it sound like we gotta add to what Jesus did to be cool with God, it's fake news. The ones that seem to suggest that you may have lost a place in the book of life.

 Who told you that there's a big filling department in heaven, and the angels are always writing names and deleting? Who lied to you that there are angel reporters following you everywhere, and writing back to heaven? Who lied to you that God blesses according to how good you have behaved? 

He has already blessed you with ALL spiritual blessings, and there's nothing left for you to work for. But legalists will always tell you that there's something left for you to do. Legalism is like a friendship bracelet that's actually handcuffs.

Do Stuff Because You're Loved, Not to Get Loved . 

There's nothing you can do to earn God's love. He already loved you when you were a sinner. Giving in church can't make Him love you some more. Nor can carrying the pastor's stuff to the pulpit every Sunday, or even helping the poor. We read the Bible, pray, and help out because we're already part of God's squad. It flows from the new nature that god gave us when we believed. It's not about brownie points.

Follow the Spirit's Lead. 

Christ left us the Holy Spirit to be our guide and helper. If only you can stop trying hard, and let the Spirit, who is the most natural thing for a believer, to do his thing. Ditch the rulebook and let the Holy Ghost be your GPS. He'll steer you right without the pressure of keeping all those man-made laws. 

Be Friends with God, Not Frightened of Him

 – Knowing God is about chilling with Him, not being scared of messing up. His grace is the warm blanket we snuggle in, not the stick that keeps us in line.

This is exactly what John is saying when he writes that perfect love drives away fear. Instead of trying very hard to be perfect in your behaviors, understand the word of God, and be perfected in His love, Know how greatly He loves you and rest in that love. God is not a Mafioso. Don't run away if you feel like you've messed up. Instead, run closer to him. After all, He's the only one who can make a better you, not yourself.

So let's ditch the fake freedom for the real deal. Jesus didn't just set us free so we could build new cages for ourselves. He wants us to kick back, let His love run the show, and enjoy the ride. So let's get into that groove, my friends, and live like grace is our jam.

How to Destroy a Beautiful Marriage

Marriage is an institution ordained by God, meant to mirror God's covenantal love for us, as was shown in Ephesians 5:25-32. But like everything of value, it becomes worthless if not handled properly. This post will delve into how to ruin a perfect marriage not because we want to fail but to point out what to avoid in building a healthy, Christ-centered union.

1. Stop Communicating

If you want to sabotage your marriage, don't communicate openly. Don't express your feelings. Don't show affection. Bottling up frustrations. Proverbs 18:21 says, "The tongue has the power of life and death." No communication kills trust and intimacy. The foundation for a great marriage is open and loving communication.

2. Be Selfish

A surefire way to kill your marriage is to make sure your own desires are met before and above the needs of your spouse. The scriptures say in Philippians 2:3-4 to "value others above yourselves, not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others." Selfishness depletes the mutual sacrifice necessary to maintain a relationship. Choose selflessness.

3. Ignore God's Design

You have to remove God's purpose for marriage, and then you will have removed the very foundation of it. Marriage is more than a human contract; it's a covenant before God. Genesis 2:24 says, "That is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife, and they become one flesh." The absence of God at the center loosens the bond. You align your marriage to His Word to make it stronger.

4. Harbor Unforgiveness

Harbor grudges, and bitterness will be the death of your relationship. Ephesians 4:31-32 reminds us to "get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger. forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you." Forgiveness is healing and unifying. Without it, even the smallest hurts fester into division.

5. Neglect Intimacy

To destroy a marriage, neglect physical and emotional intimacy. 1 Corinthians 7:3-5 reminds us that love and care in marriage is to be mutual. Intimacy isn't just physical; it's connecting on all levels. To nurture your marriage, invest in these connections intentionally.

6. Focus on Faults

Constant nagging of your spouse is a great way to tear them down. Jesus said in Matthew 7:3-5 to take the "plank in your own eye" out before judging others. Build up your spouse with encouragement instead of tearing them down with negativity.

7. Be Unequally Yoked

A mismatch in spiritual priorities creates a conflict. 2 Corinthians 6:14 says, "Do not be yoked together with unbelievers." Not only initial choices but maintaining unity in faith throughout the marriage is what is implied here. Pray together, worship together, and let Christ be that common ground.

8. Allow Outside Influences to Control You

Let other voices be the voice of your marriage, and division won't be far behind. Genesis 2:24 reminds us to leave and cleave-to make your spouse the top priority above all others. Set healthy boundaries with family, friends, and work, ensuring nothing eclipses your commitment.

9. Stop Praying Together

Prayerlessness is a silent killer of marriages. James 5:16 says, "The prayer of a righteous person is powerful and effective." In prayerlessness, couples lose access to God's power to sustain their relationship. Pray daily for wisdom, love, and strength in your marriage.

Conclusion: Building a Marriage that Lasts

And the secret to not messing up a marriage is rather simple: just do the opposite of all of the above. Devote yourself to godly communication, selflessness, forgiveness, intimacy, encouragement, spiritual unity, and prayer. Marriage requires work, but with Christ at the center, it's a beautiful reflection of God's love.

Let us, therefore, learn from what not to do and deliberately construct marriages that honor God, bless our families, and inspire others. A perfect marriage is not one with no challenges but one in which both partners choose to grow together in love, grace, and faith.

After the Christmas Fun.....

 Christmas is already behind us. Those who had gifts have already unwrapped their boxes and now we are looking forward to a new year. More celebrations...

But let's go back a bit and ask ourselves, what does Christmas really mean to me?

Some would simply say, "nothing " and move on. Christmas is to many a chance to meet with friends, eat nyama choma, get high on something.... 

Some will even tell you that Christmas is not the day christ was born. Suppose it's not? We do not have Jesus's birth certificate nor do we have the Jewish Callender, we only know that he was born. We celebrated that fact, and we don't have a problem doing so in any month. 

Here comes the third question, or is it the second? Would Jesus have celebrated his birthday, as we do? I suppose not.

Jesus's birth marked the beginning of his humiliation stage. Having lived the life of God, as creator of the world, he now had to live in the limitations of a human body. His rank was drastically lowered from lord of all to a position where mankind is: a little lower than the angels (Hebrews 2:7-9)

He would get angry, hungry, feel sad, and be limited by time and space. To be sure, he was still God, born like us(galatians 4:-5)

Before we could talk about redeeming those under the law, we should talk about the ultimate human weakness: death. God can not die, but Jesus OBEYED even death (philippians 2:8)

This is where my redemption came from. He took my place on the cross and gave me his position in heaven. Pilate found nothing to accuse him of, the law and the prophets found none either, yet God heaped all the sins of the world on him.

Because he was judged on my behalf I will not stand in judgment. He has become the end of the law so that there may be righteousness to the likes of me, who believe *(Romans 10:4)

Am waiting for Easter, which stands for my redemption and glorification.....

Can a Loving God Punish?

 

An inferno representation of wrath and hell

No, it's not the nature of God to hit back when we do wrong. He answers wrong with love.

I know what you are thinking right now: what about Sodom and Gomorrah, what about Uzaiah, what about the foot of the mountain when Moses found them worship calf and 3000 died? I will tell you; Moses's misrepresentation of God made him the first Jewish terrorist.  He ordered those men to be killed. 

Now tell me, between the idol worshipers and the killers, who was the sinner?

That's a great illustration of religion. It makes you think you are reacting on God's behalf while in real sense, you are doing your own stuff your own way.

Love, not wrath 

God always reacts with love, in fact, He proactive with love. When Adam disobeyed and found out his nakedness, God, who must have been angry in our minds, devised clothing for him. In the time of Isaiah when the whole world was sinful, God said, " Come, let's talk. Even if your sins are red as crimson, I will make you as white as snow ". 

When the stench of sin was nolonger bearable, he sent His only son to save us from the punishment for sin and the power of sin.

Galatians 3:13 NLT

[13] But Christ has rescued us from the curse pronounced by the law. When he was hung on the cross, he took upon himself the curse for our wrongdoing. For it is written in the Scriptures, “Cursed is everyone who is hung on a tree.” 

https://bible.com/bible/116/gal.3.13.NLT

The old testament writers wrote about God's wrath because they didn't understand him through the lens of Christ. Though they were inspired by the Holy Spirit to write, they had liberty to pen their own thoughts, which were shaped by the torrah and traditions. They didn't understand the God whose kindness leads to repentance. 

My Bible tells me that in his forbearance He continually let it slide until Christ came( Romans 3:25). All the punishment that was due to us was heaped on Jesus on the cross. And still on that, God did not punish Jesus as a person, but as sin personified. 

Romans 8:3 KJV

[3] For what the law could not do, in that it was weak through the flesh, God sending his own Son in the likeness of sinful flesh, and for sin, condemned sin in the flesh:

https://bible.com/bible/1/rom.8.3.KJVThat's to show that God doesn't have a problem with the sinner, but with sin itself. To save the sinner he dealt with the issue of sin completely by making his son sin itself so that we may become not just righteous, but righteousness itself in him. (2CORINTHIANS 5:21)

That's his perfect will, that we'd all be saved through Christ. Instead of lashing out, God points us to the one who can save us, the one He punished on our behalf, the one who took our weaknesses. 

To sum it all, a loving God doesn't and can't punish. Poverty is not a slap from God, nor is sickness, drought, war, or any bad tidings. The wages of sin are death, not any of the above, and Christ Jesus died on our behalf, taking away the charges that stood against us.

Colossians 2:13-15 NLT

[13] You were dead because of your sins and because your sinful nature was not yet cut away. Then God made you alive with Christ, for he forgave all our sins. [14] He canceled the record of the charges against us and took it away by nailing it to the cross. [15] In this way, he disarmed the spiritual rulers and authorities. He shamed them publicly by his victory over them on the cross.

https://bible.com/bible/116/col.2.13-15.NLT

Don't anticipate God's wrath and punishment, anticipate all the riches in his glory!

Purpose and Meaning: Making Sense of Midlife

What if midlife was a can-full of candy and worms and all crap, would we still find meaning in it?

The Midlife Crisis

Midlife, for some, feels a lot like teetering on the edge of a cliff, staring down at all that's passed by, looking out with an uncertain gaze toward what's ahead. 

The energy of youth is waning, and the quest for purpose grows louder and more insistent. Quite possibly, you will catch yourself wondering, "What am I really here for?"

The Midlife Drift

Imagine you are driving down the road, windows down, music on high. It feels great, enjoying all the things you're seeing, hearing, doing—all very new at every turn. 

But after each mile, the feeling of excitement starts to fade away, and one becomes a bit lost. That thrill starts to fade, and one is hit with the realization that maybe they are no longer headed in the right direction. 

That's what midlife can feel like. Where did those goals—set up in your 20s and 30s—get you? The kids grow up, careers level out, and life's daily grind becomes more and more visible.

An Unexpected Wake-Up Call

I recall a friend, whom we'll call only by her first name, Sue. Shortly after her 45th birthday, all was well: she was successful in her career, had her loving family, and a beautiful home, yet something was missing. 

She was just feeling an emptiness inside like her life was half there and not very fulfilling. She looked at a pile of old photo albums one day and reminisced. 

The good times seemed richer and full of texture then; she knew that she'd been busy ticking the boxes life threw her way, but inwardly, she hadn't really stopped to think: "What does it all mean?

The story of Sue is not unique. In fact, it's a chapter in many of our lives. General feeling of drift, which provides the sense of disorientation and, "We don't know what we're doing here and we don't know where to go from here." 

But this can be the beginning of something so powerful it can be unimaginable—purpose.

Meaning-making in the midst of midlife usually happens when one must stop, look back, and recollect how much life really matters and redefine his or her life. 

Scary? 

Definitely. 

Yet at this midlife mark, there is a chance to create a new definition of what life can really mean, to reframe it. As written 

Ecclesiastes 3:1, New Living Translation (NLT),

 "For everything, there is a season, a time for every activity under heaven." 

Literally, midlife is a season—a time not for the end of the road but for steering into what will bring sweet joy and satisfaction.

A Whole New Perspective

Imagine that midlife is like turning to the second chapter in this book called life. You were learning things about yourself and the world in those first chapters, and now is the time to really apply the knowledge. 

The best time to recalibrate your values and align actions in the pursuit of those values is at this moment. What stirs your passion? What will be your legacy? Those can be really big questions, but at the essence, it is what fulfills purpose.

Well, for Sue, she chose to lighten her professional load and become a volunteer at a shelter. It wasn't glamorous, but it brought her deep fulfillment. 

Her evenings, once filled with endless work emails, were now spent mentoring young women who were facing some of the same hurdles she overcame.

The Power of Faith

Another friend, Mike, got mugged by a situation much like mine. He had spent decades climbing the greasy pole, reached the top, looked around, and—so to speak—wondered, "Is this it?" 

Aching to fix the hollowness in his soul, he began to find solace in his spirituality. He seized Psalm 138:8: "The Lord will work out his plans for my life— for your faithful love, O Lord, endures forever."

It was then that Mike started to realize that his purpose was not all about success in a career. He focused on lighting his community and, in return, started a small group at his church for others to find their way toward living a life of purpose. 

Right away, it changed him and those around him.

Embrace the Journey

But finding meaning from midlife is not something that really involves a great revelation, a 180-degree turn, or doing something suddenly and really different. 

It's just about those changes that can really come in small but very deliberate steps as you move forward to live a life that you believe in, one that really expresses your deeply cherished principles. 

Embrace this season as a journey, and not the destination. Remember, you are not out in this thing alone; plenty have walked this path and gained a more fundamental, insightful sense of purpose amidst the voyage.

Ponder about it, from where you have come and where you think you are going: 

"For I know the plans I have for you," says the Lord. "They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope." —Jeremiah 29:11 (NLT)

Midlife can be the most meaningful time of your life so far—a time to refocus, find new meaning in things you love to do, and re-envision what's possible in the second half of life.

Scripture References:

Ecclesiastes3:1 LEB

Psalms 138:8 LEB

Jeremiah 29:11 LEB

Forgiveness and Reconciliation: Reconciling with the Past

You will learn to live a happier life if you learn to forgive and forget

Forgiveness

This is the source of very deep actions of forgiveness and reconciliation; they heal our souls and repair the fragmented relationships that have been disintegrated. These processes are not easy, which requires a high degree of courage and humility. In solving these ruptured relationships, the path requires that we understand true forgiveness and right the wrongs committed. The process is difficult, but at the same time, it is worthy in experiencing inner peace and spiritual growth.

Our Power to Forgive

Forgiveness is an action of power—freeing us from being enslaved by our own bitterness and resentment. Not necessarily forgetting the wrongs done to us, but choosing to let go of their claim on our hearts—in an act of the will.

Consider a lady called Sarah, who draped the albatross of her bitterness against her father for many years. He had left the family when she was but a small girl, leaving her feeling abandoned and all alone. That abandonment hurt had trailed her into adulthood, poisoning her relationships and robbing her of joy. Every time she would try to get on with her life, the bitterness pulled her back again, shining the spotlight on those ugly deep scars from her childhood.

One day, Sarah attended a church service where the preacher was talking about the power of forgiveness. 

His message pierced her heart and she suddenly realized that her angry feelings did not hurt her father at all; it only killed her inside. 

Sarah prayed that she receives the grace to forgive, not her father for his wrongful deeds towards her, but to free herself from the bitterness that had taken control of her. 

As she whispered some prayer of forgiveness, a weight lifted from her shoulders, and for the first time in years, she found true peace.

The Bible underlines that liberating power of forgiveness in

 Ephesians 4:31-32 (NLT)

Get rid of all bitterness, rage, anger, harsh words, and slander, as well as all types of evil behavior. Instead, be kind to each other, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God through Christ has forgiven you."* The journey of forgiveness for Sarah had enabled her to move on, no longer held hostage by the pain in her past.

The Road to Reconciliation

While forgiveness is a personal act, reconciliation is a joint effort. It involves the rebuilding of trust and restoration of relationships gone bad. 

Reconciliation is a process that calls for humility and patience and often the will to confront unpleasant truths.

Consider the example from the Bible of Joseph. While his brothers sold him off into slavery, he spent years being away from home, undergoing so much hardship, and led a completely different life. 

Even when his brothers wrongly sold him into slavery, Joseph did not take revenge on them when he finally rose to a position of power within the government of Egypt. 

He tested the hearts of the brothers, to see whether they had changed or not, and after he was convinced that they were truly repentant, Joseph revealed himself to them, embraced them, and gave them his forgiveness.

In Genesis 50:20-21 (NLT), Joseph tells his brothers', "You intended to harm me, but God intended it all for good. He brought me to this position so I could save the lives of many people.  21  No, don't be afraid. I will continue to take care of you and your children." So he reassured them by speaking kindly to them.

Joseph did not immediately set on a reconciliatory journey. It took him some internalization that probably God would heal the wounds of the past. 

Joseph, for giving his brothers and reconciling with them, did not just restore his family; he eventually saved them from the famine.

 Reconciling With the Past

Reconciling with the past is an important step that has to be made on the journey to forgiveness and reconciliation—to acknowledge the pain, seek healing, and decide to walk on with love and grace. 

It does not mean that the past has been erased or that the wrongs, by some magical process, are now right, but it does mean that now no longer has the past power over our present and future.

When we reflect on the stories of Sarah and Joseph, we realize that forgiveness and reconciliation are very important to our relationship with God. 

They are the most faithful of acts: the incidents that challenge us and call us to embrace God's plan and transforming power, that even in the agony of it all, it could result in healing and growth.

In 2 Corinthians 5:18 (NLT), Paul reminds us, "And all of this is a gift from God, who brought us back to himself through Christ. And God has given us this task of reconciling people to him."

 Just as God has reconciled us to Himself through Christ, we are called to pursue reconciliation in our relationships.

Conclusion

Forgiveness and reconciliation are not easy, yet they are part and parcel of our well-being and spiritual growth. In the act of forgiving and striving for reconciliation with others, the deepest healing and peace will come. 

It is painful, but what freedom of the past and the future that you gain with every step is so much a benefit.

As you consider your personal history, think about areas where you might need to forgive or be reconciled. Pray for empowerment to make the necessary steps, believing that God will guide your process. 

Remember, although the past shapes us, it does not define us. Forgiveness and reconciliation can bring freedom that will enable us to move on—to live in the fullness of God's grace.

How to Create a Deeper Relationship with God

 

Grow in Faith

Becoming more intimate with God is not just an experience. It's an ongoing process that calls for dedication, reflection and a teachable spirit. There are so many who want to be closer to God, but only want to do it by their own efforts, and by their own standards.

On the contrary, God wants to bring you closer to Himself by his own hand, and on His own terms. After all Christ is not the bride: you are. Now tell me; between the bride and the groom, who entreats the other to themselves? The groom, right? Then why do you want things to be different with God?

Spiritual Growth... or is it growth in Faith?

When people talk of growing spiritually, they are referring to being conformed to the image of christ. It's a process that starts from the time you believe in the gospel of Christ, and continues.....

2 Corinthians 3:18

New International Version

18 And we all, who with unveiled faces contemplate[a] the Lord’s glory, are being transformed into his image with ever-increasing glory, which comes from the Lord, who is the Spirit.

Sanctification, as it's referred, is a process grounded on the working of the Holy Spirit. All you need to do is to yield yourself up to his leading, and he will gradually transform you from inside out. In Galatians 5:22-23, Paul lists the fruits that will be apparent in you when you subject to the leadership of the Holy Spirit.

However, you would do better than to try to force them out of yourself without Him having born them inside you. You will burn out sooner or later. If you are guava inside, don't struggle to bear mangoes. Wait till the Holy Spirit bears them through you in increasing measure.

Prayer and Meditation

Prayer is not just another ritual or even a religious activity. It is communion with God. In prayer we thank God for all He has done, which can see or are yet to see, we interact with Him through the connection of His Spirit, and cast our care unto him.

It is for this reason that we are reminded to pray without ceasing. (1 Thessalonians 5:16). Like your most cherished lover, God wants to be in communion with you. You don't have to ask, ask, ask, ask. You can marvel at the divine attributes of God.

Pray for others, pray for the nation...by all means pray. Instead of sulking you can take those worries to God This is what He is telling us:

Philipians 4:6-7

But before you can pray effectively, you need to know what the word of God says. This is because an effective prayer is based on God's will, which you can only know through His word.

That is exactly what is contained in the Bible. God's word is His power... unto salvation. It has all the things you require to live an abundant life. If you meditate on the word of God daily(Psalms 1:2-3), then you will have led a beautiful life. You will know God all the more, and will be drawn to him all the more, and His power will be more apparent in your life.

The Role of the Holy Spirit

As said earlier, it is the work of th eHoly Spirit to build a more intimate bond between you and God, and yours is to subject yourself to him. His indwelling guidance will help you live a life that honors God. 

The Indwelling Spirit

Upon believing and being born again, the believer is indwelt by the Holy Spirit. He is not just a sign of salvation and a mark that we belong to God, he is also the springboard for sanctification and the driving force too. In 1 Corinthians 6:19, Paul speaks of our bodies as the temples of the Holy Spirit.

Well he is not talking of the temple like the church where we go to every sunday and go about our businesses out of church the whole week: He is talking from the priest's point of view, because th epriest lived in the temple. Now the Holy Spirit has made our bodies his dwelling place. He's not moving out any time soon or later.

He signifies that we are set aside for God's purposes, and continues to make small changes within us to conform us to our new identity.

While inside us, the Spirit testifies with out souls that we are children of God(Romans 8:16-20). As God's children, he nourishes us with what we need for growth in faith and in knowledge of the truth. He convicts the world of its sin through us and demonstrates our righteousness in God(John 16:8) He is the only one we need in us to live a life concurrent with our new nature in Christ.

The Holy Spirit as a Guide

In John 16:13, Christ promised the Helper who would lead us into all truth. He has now come, lives in us and leads us into the word of truth. His guidance is more than that of a father to a son; he searches the innermost secrets of God and helps us align with the thoughts of God.

This is more than a mere discernment of right and wrong. In fact, no one has ever been made right with God by doing what is right and shunning the wrong. The Holy Spirit makes us understand th escriptures in depth, allowing us to know what exactly God is saying and meaning and thus cementing our faith in Him.

Needless to say, the Bible is God's blueprint, and to understand it is to get into his thoughts. Furthermore, it is the primary tool for sanctification, as it bares the character of God to us and tells us, " this is what you have become.(2 Timothy 3:16-17)

This brings to mind the story of a vulture that was captured as a small chick, and brought up among chickens. As the small chicks quaked and scratched, the small vulture, we shall call her Hellen, having no other role model, believed she was one of them and scratched and tried to quack like them. 

In her adolescence Hellen was behaving exactly like the other adolescent chicks, but wished she could fly every time an eagle passed by. But one day a vulture perched herself in a nearby tre and said in vulture language, " you are one of us, look at me and compare with yourself!" Hellen looked at her reflection in a water tray and realized she was more of a vulture than a hen

When the vulture in the tree flew away, Hellen followed suit, flapped her wings and glided in flight. That's what the Spirit does to us. When we read what humans can't do, He tells us, " you are gods"(Psalms 82:6). When the world is cracking under the weight of sin he announces to us that we can not sin(1 John 3:9). When others are struggling to grasp the truth, the Spirit has revealed all things to us(1 John 2:20). I have covered more in depth on the role of the Holy Spirit in my book. Grab a copy and read more.

If you give yourself wholly to the Holy Spirit, are intentional on getting deeper into a relationship with God, and are committed to the journey, you hav eno cause for worry. Many have been here and succeeded. In fact, there is nothing to succeed in. It is God drawing you near to Himself. Yours is to comply. To believe him when he says you are what His word says you are.

 As we commit to prayer, meditation on Scripture, fellowship with other believers, and reliance on the Holy Spirit, we will find ourselves growing in faith, love, and holiness. As I have said earlier in this blog, growing in faith and getting deeper is not a destination but a journey. With the help of the Holy Spirit, you have already been brought close to God. In fact, You are in God.

3 Steps to Forgiveness and Reconciliation

 

Of the deadliest poisons, one is bitterness, because it eats away at the heart leaving in its wake broken relationships, pain and spiritual decay. But you must be asking yourself, "can I really unshackle myself from the bondage of acrimony?

You are not alone( not good news though). there are so many others just like you,strugglung with anger, unresolved issues, and deep-seated hurt that create a barricade of resentment, which separates you from others and even from experiencing the very essence of God.

Good news: there is a cure, which you have been avoiding. like the sour-tasting pills that make you puke but ultimately ease your pain, you will only find healing within forgiveness and reconciliation.

The Burden of Bitterness

Holding on to grudges is like carrying a heavy load that only gets heavier with time. The more you harbor piqueness in your heart, the more you feel the need to revenge. The truth is, bitterness is not just an emotional burden: it seeps into every aspect of your life, affecting your relationships, physical and mental health, and spiritual well-being.

In Hebrews 12:15, the Bible warns:

Hebrews 12:15

The Voice

15 Watch carefully that no one falls short of God’s favor, that no well of bitterness springs up to trouble you and throw many others off the path.

Bitterness defiles both the wronged person and also those around them. It's like a fart, that makes the air foul for those in the vicinity though it only came from one person. But this one does not lead to a mere twitching of the nose: it leads to anger, malice revenge, and separates us from those we care about.

Forgiveness

Forgiveness is not about justifying wrongs done to us or even forgetting the pain. There is another word for that. Instead, it's about releasing yourself from the grip of anger and resentment. 

You don't have to be a prisoner of your own feelings all your life. You don't have to carry someone in your heart for decades. You don't have to keep poisoning yourself till thy kingdom come.

Forgiveness is an act of grace, a decision to let go of the need for revenge, and entrust justice to God. Imagine one day without that lump in your throat when you think of a certain person, won't it be great? This life is too short to allow yourself to languish in enmity.

Let God do the heavy-lifting while you enjoy life to the fullest. If you ever feel like you have been subjugated, justice belongs to God. Instead of planning how to get at the other person, plan on a night out with friends. You can even invite the one who wronged you and start working things out.

This is what Christ Jesus taught:

Matthew 6:14-15

The Voice

Jesus says to declare forgiveness of those who have wronged us. This is because forgiveness of other people emulates God’s forgiveness of us.

14 If you forgive people when they sin against you, then your Father will forgive you when you sin against Him and when you sin against your neighbor. 15 But if you do not forgive your neighbors’ sins, your Father will not forgive your sins.

Forgiveness starts with a conscious decision. A decision to let go of hard feelings and to embrace the brighter side of life. The results may not happen overnight. The pain may linger, but each step brings toward healing.

Don't hesitate to take that step toward a better you. Don't stop at what someone did to you. Don't be halted by your feelings, which may try to steer you in another direction. 

Forgiveness unchains you from bitterness and opens the door to reconciliation.

Reconciliation

Forgiveness is individual, but reconciliation is mutual. It requires the input of both parties. One party extends grace and the other receives. Sometimes it's not about who did wrong, or who failed, it's about forging a new path and putting the past behind you.

Restoring broken relationships is not a walk in the park though: it requires courage, humility, repentance and willingness to walk together. This is not subjective to which party, the aggrieved or otherwise, but a mutual need. All parties need these qualities in equal proportion for reconciliation to surfice.

However this doesn't mean that broken relationships will be reinstated to their previous position. It is normal for people to act suspicious of each other after coming back together, or to harbor some sort of reservations. But at least by making an effort towards reconciling, peace and understanding can be achieved.

Matthew 5:23-24

The Voice

23 Therefore, if you are bringing an offering to God and you remember that your brother is angry at you or holds a grudge against you, 24 then leave your gift before the altar, go to your brother, repent and forgive one another, be reconciled, and then return to the altar to offer your gift to God.

Reconciliation is an act of obedience to God, reflecting his desire for us to live in peace and harmony, unity and love. It's not a requirement of some basic law we must fulfil, but the very essence of the image of God.

Don't be afraid, even the most fractured relationships can be healed. You just need to be willing to work together to glue the pieces together. 

Path to Renewal

the path towards reconciliation through forgiveness meanders through thickets, rocks and swamps. It's Not easy, but it's vital.

It's a journey that requires humility, courage, faith... but the rewards are immeasurable. I once asked a lady if she was so furious with me as to put a bullet through my head, and it prompted a huge debate that eventually led to "peace talks". Am not proud of the approach I took then, but at least it ignited something that shed light on our predicament.

Instead of pointing her resentment at me like a loaded gun, she put the safety catch back on and downed her arms so we could talk things over. That's the spirit of forgiveness and reconciliation.

By choosing reconciliation, you break free from bondage to bitterness and open your heart to healing, restoration of relationship and to peace.

Ephesians 4:32

New International Version

32 Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.

Christ Jesus is the epitome of forgiveness and reconciliation. He bore our sins, forgave us and reconciled us to God. Imagine if God still held a grudge against you; how long would you live? But he didn't wait for you to say how sorry you were. Instead He packaged Himself in a body like yours, to be able to feel like you, and bore the punishment due to you.

I know you can't possibly die for your most treasured mate, let alone your enemy. but you can definitely try to bring them closer. Remember, the burden of hurt lies heavily on you, not the other person who wronged you. It's you who is wounded, not them.

It's you who is imprisoned by your own negative feelings. Follow Christ's example and break free. Don't be held back anymore by negativity. Don't suffer while others are enjoying this precious life. Let go of spite and embrace love. 

Remember: there is renewal in forgiveness and reconciliation.

The Ultimate Guide to Finding Solace in Faith Amidst Grief and Loss

 

Healing from Pain and Agony

Grief is an unwanted burden that proves overwhelming to many. Well, some may take it in their stride, but others are unable to cope, while others struggle to come along.

When we think of grief, so many things come to mind. But loss of a loved one, dream, cherished part of life, and such occurrences can rip us apart, leaving us in a furtive search for a lifeline. During times like these you realize how naked you are, and how vulnerable you can be.

Understanding Grief

Grief is a very natural part of human emotion, that elicits emotions of sorrow, anger and disbelief. This is not to say that you are not allowed to feel otherwise when going through grief, but these are some of the most experienced feelings in grief. 

However, it is good to remind yourself that grief is not a destination but a journey. In fact, part of a journey. You could be mourning today and celebrating tomorrow. Just go through this rough patch at your own pace and with grace. You will come out the other end a stronger person.

Is there a right way of going through heartbrokenness? No, there isn't right or wrong in distress. every situation is unique, and everyone was created differently, so you would handle your agony differently. It's allowed. 

Even when you feel like giving in, remind yourself that the pain may seem unbearable, but healing is possible. Just focus on healing.

The Power of Faith

Faith is an indispensable source of comfort during loss. It gives a framework for understanding suffering, hope, and is a connection to God Himself, who is way greater than you( or your loss) 

Many people turn to different distractions to escape the underlying feelings that come with loss, but there a few real solutions that you could turn to. God is the central focus when it comes to healing from heartache. His words are filled with relief, understanding and optimism.

Look at what he says:

Psalm 23:4

New International Version

4 

Even though I walk
    through the darkest valley,[a]
I will fear no evil,
    for you are with me;
your rod and your staff,
    they comfort me.

God will never leave you even in your darkest hour. He is here, always speaking comforting words to you. He is here offering his shoulder for you. He is here, giving the best of heaven to you.

2 Corinthians 1:3-4

New International Version

Praise to the God of All Comfort

3 Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, 4 who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves receive from God.

Today you are being comforted. Tomorrow you will be strong enough to comfort others. It's God who says it in His word. He is filled with compassion and understanding, that He can't let you be when you are beside yourself. He is beside you instead, carrying you through it all.

John 14:27

New International Version

27 Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.

The peace of God surpasses all manner of human understanding. When He gives you peace, nothing in this world, or the next, would ever disturbed you. Are you feeling like the signs of a storm inside you? Embrace the peace that God gives.

The good thing with the peace of God is that it does not come with a price tag. When He gives, it's in the true sense of giving. In your grief, you have God giving peace to you, and expecting nothing in return.

The power of faith is beautifully illustrated in the story of my grandfather. A man of strong faith, he was devastated by the loss of his son, Nahashon - the brightest star among his many children. The pain was almost unbearable. 

I was a young boy, in Form One, and felt helpless in the face of such sorrow. Yet, amidst the storm of grief, my grandfather’s faith, coupled with the support of his district fellowship, became a beacon of hope.

His testimony is a testament to the enduring power of faith. It’s a reminder that even in the darkest hours, hope can be found.

Finding hope

Did I just say that hope can be found? How and where? Before I start baring the truth to you, let's flesh out some truth: faith doesn't cross out pain, but it offers us the hope of a better future. 

We know that even if things might look bleak today, we are assured of better things tomorrow. Through faith we believe in a future where healing and restoration are possible. Not just possible, but very real.

When we know hat healing is possible we start envisioning it in our minds and working towards it. Misery stops being our driving force, and consolation and inspiration takes its place.

Slowly, a step at a time, you start making progress our of your agony, and into happiness. Am not promising you a one-day experience that leaves you feeling great again, no: grief is a process that takes time. 

Just take those baby steps towards healing, and work your way up. Be patient with yourself and allow yourself to feel your emotions. Who doesn't experience them?

Seeking Support

During tormenting times, it's advisable to not shrink back into your cocoon and rot in misery. Instead, it would be of great help to surround yourself with a supportive community. They don't have to be all the witty and mighty people, or the most sympathetic. Your normal group of friends can do.

The idea is to enable you to share your feelings with someone who can lend an ear, be it a support group, trusted friend.... or you can seek professional counselling. By all means, don't keep your feelings to yourself. You don't have to go through it alone.

You will realize at the end that grief, though a challenging experience, is a great opportunity for growth and spiritual deepening. Do you remember the song that goes, "what doesn't kill you makes you stronger, stand a little taller..."

Grief is not there to kill you: It's there to shake out the loose bolts, and replace them with steel-reinforced ones. Your loss is for your detriment ,but so that you can gain experience in life, and a testimony for the future.

Through faith you will find solace, strength and hope to carry you through.

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en.wikipedia.org